Date #6 AKA Young Spielberg


#6’s Stats

Age: 32

Height: 5’10

Ethnicity: Caucasian

Job: Entertainment

Kids: None                Wants: Yes

Drinks: Yes

Smokes: Occasionally (yuck!)

Single for: ??

PRE-DATE

He initiated contact and seemed like a cool guy.  Handsome yet awkward.  I knew he was going to be super slim which I dreaded.  Noassatall may be fine with most girls, but concave just isn’t desireable for me.  Plus, I can’t pass on a gene like that to my children, it would be very irresponsible…

We chatted for a while online and exchanged  notes back and forth about movies about living in LA, about loathing LA, and about loving it.  He was out of town working on a film but when he got back, we quickly made plans for a bowling date. 

THE FIRST IMPRESSION

I was rushing from work and didn’t get a chance to put on my make-up.  As I sat in the car about to apply my lipstick, he walked up and said hello.  Crap! Oh well whatever, it’s bowling and he’s already seen me now.  He was a bit older looking than his profile photo’s which worked in his favor.  He had the sex appeal that 30 and 40 year olds have for younger women.  The graying stubble and the chisled face.  His eyes were gorgeous and stood out from behind the frames on his face.  Tshirt and jeans, nothing too impressive but what can I say, it’s bowling and I didn’t have on a face. 

THE DATE

We had exchanged so much shit talking back and forth about what this bowling game was going to be that when we walked up to the counter he immediately paid for 3 games.  The bowling alley was not anything fancy and I had this constant threat looming above my head that my purse was going to get stolen or the gang banger in the next lane was going to gang bang me if given the opportunity.  *Creepy!*  (I stepped up to bowl and this guy walked directly right up next to me as if he knew me – Not very comfortable). 

Anyway, he was kinda quiet, but a lot of times, I appreciate quiet.  I like just having company sometimes and seeing as how I was winning this game his company was nothing but appreciated.  My winning streak didn’t last too long.  I’m kinda glad about that.  How attractive would he have been to me if he would have lost all 3 games?  

After bowling, it was time for a laugh.  We went to a comedy improv show and where  I volunteered to go on stage so I guess it must have left a positive impression because he leaned forward in his seat to watch me.  When we left the show, he grabbed my hand and we ran across the street.  In grabbing my hand he told me that he was taking the lead and definitely not interested in being friends. 

I PICTURED OUR FUTURE TO BE

We’d be friends for a long while.  I’d probably try to pawn him off on an amazing girl that I knew who wasn’t into assess but he’d be very much about me (gotta love my ego!).  I after dating 94 more guys and waiting for Mr. Right to show up on my doorstep would eventually see that he’s the catch of the century.  Then, we’d get married and I’d be the bread winner supporting his dream until I got knocked up and then he’d go do a job he hated somewhere because that’s the kind of guy he is.   Coming home smelling like cigarettes because he’s now a chain smoker who’s secretly resentful… and I would cry at night because my children suffer from noassatall.   

WHAT I LIKED ABOUT HIM

He’s funny, smart,  creative.  Gorgeous eyes!  We have similar reasons for doing what we do in life. 

WHAT I DIDN’T LIKE ABOUT HIM

He doesn’t have a steady job.  I would have to take the back burner for who knows how long. 

WHAT I LEARNED ABOUT MYSELF

I like when guys assert their dominance. 

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Date #5 – Mr. DeMille


#5’s Stats

Age: 30   (looks 40)

Height: 6’1

Ethnicity: Caucasian

Job: Entertainment

Kids: None                Wants: Yes

Drinks: No

Smokes: No

Single for: ??

PRE-DATE

I came across a profile where the guy was traditionally not what I would look for in a boyfriend or someone I would even make out with on a drunken occassion.  He wasn’t unattractive, he just wasn’t my type physically.  As I read his profile, a bunch of commonalities popped up and I thought, sure, why not.  It’s not like I have to marry the guy or I’m obligated to go out with him a second time.

THE FIRST IMPRESSION

He arrived before me.  Not sure how long he had been waiting but I was on time.  He forewarned me that he cut his facial hair which had me on pins and needles before meeting him because that could be a good thing or a bad thing.  When I saw him waiting, I knew it was him only because I received a text from him letting me know he was there.  He was dressed in a button down and jeans.  He had a nice face kinda like a school teacher or preacher.

THE DATE

We talked while we waited for our table.  Initially I thought we were having two different conversations almost as if he confused me with someone else.  He commented on my job without really knowing where I work and exactly what I did but I figured it was nerves.

When we sat down, we continued talking.  It was as if there was no breaking point between thoughts and it flowed and I appreciated that I could be my inner geek in front of him and talk about Sci-fi.  That was fun.  He talked about work and projects he was working on as if it were his normal way of impressing girls only to find out that I was more interested in talking about comic books.  Our service was pretty slow.  When he did stop by the waiter flirted with me which was pretty hilarious.  I’m not sure if we looked like the odd couple or if the waiter was just that rude.

After dinner, we went for ice cream.  We continued talking for a while and just when I got comfortable, the uncomfortable question pops up:  Why are you on the dating site? Which translates to:  Why are you single? I can’t just tell the truth and say, because I just haven’t met him yet so here’s my chance to reveal my flaws.  I tell him that it’s because I have my guard up and I’m horrible at communicating with guys I actually like.   Sad, but true!

He responded with some weird comment about how some women in LA are screwed up and guarded.  I just used the word guarded, was he not listening or was this just a nervous reaction to what I said.  Keeping a mental note of this one.   He proceeds to tell me that his job calls for a lot of demands and because most people don’t see him outside of that environment, it makes him undateable…

After ice cream he asks if we can continue the night.  While we had a blast talking, I realized that I had a lot of work cut out for me the next day and I couldn’t help but to think about #3 and #4.  In the back of my mind, I wondered if  I even had a chance with #3.  As physical attraction goes, he’s more my speed.  Then, I thought about #4.  I think I would have great conversation with #4 and we still haven’t had our second date yet and as physical attraction goes, he’s golden.  All this in a fraction of a second to say that I wasn’t physically attracted to #5.  I liked talking to him, but I knew this was the guy you’d have to date for a while and then he’d grow on you and you’d get past it… Maybe this is the route I’m supposed to take in finding true love, but I just don’t think I’m ready for any close-ups with Mr. DeMille.  95 more to go, no need to settle.

He leaned in to kiss me and I dodged it like a bullet and turned into the hug as if it were the best hug ever and slipped back to my car.   What can I say, he’s no #3.  He asked for a second date and I told him we’d talk next week after my schedule died down… I didn’t want to say, let me see what’s going on with #3 and #4 first.  SMH.

I PICTURED OUR FUTURE TO BE

When we spent time together we would talk hours on end about any and everything.  Matching Halloween costumes, trips to every tech and film festival imaginable.  We’d be that couple that everyone was like, what, really?   Roger Ebert started dating Halle Berry?!   Then hell would freeze over.

WHAT I LIKED ABOUT HIM

He’s fun to talk to, he’s very witty, and patient.

WHAT I DIDN’T LIKE ABOUT HIM

Not physically attracted to him (yet?).  Not the best listener.

WHAT I LEARNED ABOUT MYSELF

I’m too nice.  I need to get the hell out of dodge the second I know it’s not going to work and not try to justify it and try to “rationalize” it into working.  I used the dreaded, “I’ll call you” line .  SMH.

Date #4 – The Counselor


THE COUNSELOR’S STATS

Age: 28

Height:  6’1

Ethnicity: Caucasian

Job:  Counselor

Kids: None                Wants:  Yes

Drinks: No

Smokes: No

Single for:  ??

PRE-DATE

We got off to a quick start chatting and then he disappeared.  He was attractive in his pictures but I was a bit apprehensive about his beard and mustache.  I’m not against beards and mustaches, just when they are lined thinly or too bushy I get scared.  I hate getting red faced after kissing someone whose facial hair will cut into my face or when their facial hair will make me stare uncomfortably at their face wondering who committed this travesty to such a handsome canvas.  Ok, enough with the beards…

Very bluntly he told me he’s not a writing guy and I get that.  I like writing to guys on the site, but some guys just don’t have it in them.  So we made a date to meet for coffee. And I’m sure as a professional counselor  he just wanted to analyze me first to make sure I wasn’t a nutzo.  By the time we booked our coffee date, I was over the long dates and the akwardness the first 2 had caused. 

THE FIRST IMPRESSION

I walked into the coffee shop and he was standing there all tall and handsome waiting for me.  I don’t know why, but the second I opened the door, I knew it was him.  We greeted with a hug as if we’d known each other and I knew he was pleasantly surprised to see that I looked like my pictures.  That’s a good thing considering the long night I had before.  He smiled genuinely and it made me feel welcomed.  And the beard… was ok. 

THE DATE

We sat down and talked a little.  It was easy with him and I can see why he’s good at what he does.  We cracked jokes back and forth a little and talked about what we liked and I was pleased to find out that he’s not a drinker and doesn’t really like unecessarily loud places which was a great comfort to find another person who could just chill and do things that are typical or aren’t and be comfortable without all the chaos. 

Unfortunately our meeting got interrupted abruptly with a work responsibility I had, but I guess this is good.  It was the perfect set up for a second date.  In a counselor like fashion, he asked me, “What do you think?” And I managing to make every situation awkward and difficult responded looking at my drink, “it’s ok.”  I guess I’m a jerk and wanted to hear him ask me out a second time.  He responded, “No.  About us going out.”  To which I said yes. 

Hopefully he doesn’t over analyze that and think it’s a lack of interest.  We shall see…

I PICTURED OUR FUTURE TO BE

Lots of outdoor activities and conversations about any and everything.  Cooking together as a past time.  Talking every single potential problem out.  A perpetual argument about me rationalizing everything to the point where it isn’t rational so we argue about my inability to rationalize coherently…. My head hurts.  Shut up and kiss me! And to that, he responds, No, not until we talk it out. 

WHAT I LIKED ABOUT HIM

He’s very attractive, funny, smart,  able to laugh at himself, and very genuine.   

WHAT I DIDN’T LIKE ABOUT HIM

Younger than me shouldn’t be an issue because he seems to be mature, but I’m kinda shakey on this one. 

WHAT I LEARNED ABOUT MYSELF

I’m addicted to my blackberry and I need to find a way to shut it off.